All posts by Chris Butera

Chris Butera enjoys going to metal concerts, reading and having a cold one with friends.
Pro Wrestling

Spaceman Frank’s WWE Hell in a Cell 2015 Predictions

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By Frank Lucci

Hell in a Cell 2015 promises to be one of the more memorable pay per views of the year, but for all the wrong reasons.

What should have been a stacked card that has been built up expertly over several weeks  has turned into a plate of hot garbage. The WWE has managed to waste appearances by Ric Flair, Shawn Michaels and Stone Cold Steve Austin (side note: HOW THE HELL DO YOU BOTCH STONE COLD’S RETURN?) and filled the top matches with aging superstars instead of the hot young talent who WWE can’t even be bothered to come up with feuds for despite having around seven hours of weekly programming to fill.

Despite all this, there are a few matches with potential on the card that should give fans something to cheer for. Here are the predictions for Hell in a Cell 2015.

Preshow Match: Dolph Ziggler, Cesaro and Neville vs. Rusev, Sheamus and King Barrett.

This match was originally supposed to Randy Orton and Dean Ambrose vs. Luke Harper and Braun Strowman, but apparently Orton has hurt his shoulder (again) and Harper was removed from the card because of a family situation (wish him the best). Harper lives in the same suburb of Rochester as me, so this slight is unforgivable. Anyway, this match features six men who have nothing going for them unless you count being Mr. Money in the Bank, a former world champ or being european as something.

Given time this could be a great match, but it will most likely be a ten minute snorefest as JBL yells about Mountain Dew and Premier League Futbol. The face team will pull out the victory because Rusev needs to be punished for having his fiance’ be excited they are getting married instead of keeping that shit on lockdown and Barrett and Sheamus aren’t allowed to have nice things in general.

Kevin Owens (C) vs. Ryback (Intercontinental Championship Match)

Vince McMahon most likely booked this match during his play time where he smashed the two superstars action figures together like a five year old before realizing he could make this happen in real-life.

WWE had a chance to develop this feud after Owens won the title by cheating but instead they just had these two bounce around aimlessly. With no added stipulations to raise the stakes, expect Owens to cheat again to win to show how despicable he is in a lackluster hoss fight.

John Cena (C) vs. TBD (US Championship Open Challenge)

I can see Cena’s match breaking down in three ways:

1. Newly called up wrestler Tyler Breeze answers the challenge and sneakily wins the championship from Cena to give Breeze some much needed rub considering his NXT run ended with him losing over and over again at Takeover specials. Perhaps Breeze could hit Cena with the “Beauty Shot” or the “Unprettier” and injure Cena’s nose again to get the victory. On Raw the hurting Cena could be taken out by Lesnar or some other force so he can take his time off and have  feuds ready to go.

2. The New Day shows up and use their numbers game to take down Cena and give Xavier Woods a championship (as he is on the sideline for their title defenses 90% of the time.) Then The New Day could get some real heel heat by dismantling Cena and knocking him out of action so they get more boos from the WWE target audience of children. Then when Cena comes back he can heroically overcome the odds yet again (despite almost never losing a single match) because BIG MATCH JOHN MAGGLE.

3. Dolph Ziggler challenges and beats Cena for the championship using some less than heroic tactics. Ziggler goes full heel the next night which leads to Cena being taken out for his vacation. This ties into the “Total Divas” storyline and allows Ziggler to take on some fresh opponents. No matter what, I expect Cena to lose (if you couldn’t tell).

The New Day (C) vs. The Dudley Boyz (WWE Tag Team Championship)

The WWE had several chances to put the titles on the Dudley Boyz. The forgettable Madison Square Garden show, for example.  But instead had The New Day repeatedly disqualify themselves to keep the titles. This is good heel tactics, but at least point switching the championships would be fairly anticlimactic.

With the Dudley Boyz once again getting a rematch with no added stipulations, The New Day will likely win, Xavier Woods will get destroyed afterwards, and the tag team division will keep spinning it’s wheels.

Charlotte (C) vs. Nikki Bella (Divas Championship Match)

With the Divas Revolution quickly losing steam, Charlotte (and by extension, Becky Lynch and Sasha Banks) need to do something to capture the magic that the NXT women’s division has. Feuds with Team Bella is not the solution. Charlotte wins, Nikki films an episode of “Total Divas” about how sad she is about it, and the WWE gives Sasha Banks (who clearly is the fan’s choice for favorite new Diva) a shot (and maybe gives Becky Lynch something to do besides hang out with Ric Flair at ringside to cheer her bestie on).

Roman Reigns vs. Bray Wyatt (Hell in a Cell Match)

This feud started out promising, but overall the Reigns vs. Wyatt program has shown how far behind Reigns is compared to Wyatt and his BFF Ambrose. BUT HE’S TALL AND TAN BY GAWD so now we’re stuck with him.

Wyatt has attempted to keep people engaged with this feud by delivering his signature promos, but after three months of his “anyone but you” schtick it is time for this to end.

By the way, nice of Wyatt to summarize the internet’s feelings about Reigns and help us feud with him by proxy. Reigns did his best to get us emotionally invested in him with his infamous “I’m doing this for, like, my family and stuff” promo, which only went to show how much better Wyatt is as a talker and how much more natural charisma Ambrose has. At the go home Raw, the WWE then tried to get people hyped by bringing out Ric Flair. Instead, Flair puttered around the ring and said Reign’s name to try and get the crowd to pop.

I guess it was better than Flair bursting into tears every time Charlotte wrestles.

With rumors of Reigns winning the World Heavyweight Championship at WrestleMania circling again, Wyatt will lose this match as he always does, then find another guy we hope he will defeat and gain momentum, but ultimately end up jobbing to.

Seth Rollins (C) vs. Kane (World Heavyweight Championship Match)

Does anyone else feel like this will be the bathroom break match between Hell in a Cell matches? The Corporate Kane/Demon Kane thing is kinda funny, kinda meta, but does not belong anywhere near the championship picture. Have this be a random offshoot of an Authority storyline, but not something involving Rollins, who goes from wrestling AARP Sting to wrestling a 48 year-old guy who is an honest to God grandfather.

Can we get this guy a challenger who works full time on the roster and is under the age of 40?

Another side note to this feud: way to bring out Shawn Michaels to bury the champ and eat some kids pizza (which probably cost $8).

Rollins vs HBK would be a bonkers match but it will never happen and Michaels did not seem to care much about selling people on Rollins or his match.

Another legend wasted.

Please let this be a swan song for Kane, who deserves to bow out in a decent match for all he has done for the WWE over the years. While he should not be gunning for the championship, he should have a nice moment to close his career out and transition to becoming HR Representative Kane to counter The Authority’s thuggish tactics.

Brock Lesnar vs. The Undertaker (Hell in a Cell Match)

WHO’S READY FOR SOME TORTURE PORN???

Seriously though, I fear for the Undertaker in this match. The guy had a massive concussion (which by the way, never stopped him from competing while Daniel Bryan continues to sit out) after WrestleMania 30, then collapsed after his match with Lesnar at Summerslam.

Clearly the guy cannot hang with Lesnar anymore and should not be doing this. Any enjoyment to be had will be mixed with the feeling that Undertaker can be legit hurt at any moment (I know the point of Hell in a Cell matches is to be dangerous and violent, but at some point you need to step in and say enough is enough).

Brock wins, Undertaker has his big retirement hoopla in Dallas at WrestleMania 32 and rides off into the sunset. Personally, I’d like to see ‘Taker vs Bo Dallas in a easy squash at ‘Mania so the crowd can watch the legend take a bow and not worry about whether he can walk on his own power after the match.

#DallasinDallas people make it happen!

Music, Podcast

Bonesaw Podcast: Episode 21: Mick Mayer from Sonic Pulse

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Our guest at this time is Mick Mayer from Adventure Metal band (who’s last release bears the same title) Sonic Pulse. Mick and Chris shoot the breeze on touring, music, comic books and more – including Sonic Pulse’s upcoming album “Vs. The Internet” and why they band covers the “Adventure Time” theme song.

Movies

Trailer Feedback: Star Wars: Episode VII – The Force Awakens (Trailer 3)

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The galaxy shook Monday night as the third (and presumably final) trailer for Star Wars: The Force Awakens was unveiled.

For starters, we finally have a trailer with plot elements (and how) in contrast to the cryptic nature of the previous two.

Han Solo and Princess Leia (reprised by Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher) look weary as the battle between good and evil will continue with the latest Sith leader Kylo Ren’s (Adam Driver) Dark Side army in honor of Darth Vader’s memory. Given these facts, it’s plausible that Ren either does not know or refuses to believe Vader’s final act was a redeeming one. Regardless, the galactic power couple of Solo and Leia will more likely serve as mentors to our main protagonists (and latest Jedi) Rey and Finn (Daisy Ridley and John Boyega).

However, there’s no trace of Luke Skywalker (who Mark Hamill is reprising), leading us to believe he may be returning in the form of flashbacks or voice work.

Excitement, breathtaking visuals and suspense permeate the trailer – letting our imaginations run wild. A nice touch of Stormtrooper combat, a neat inside shot of the X-Wing and the almighty lightsaber dual make your childhood memories fondly flow back to you. Despite their ages, it looks like Han and Chewie (reprised by Peter Mayhew) are back for one last hurrah this Christmas.

For the love of God, please don’t let this movie suck.

Music

Band of the Week: Frank Zappa

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Arguably one of music’s most unique personalities, Frank Zappa was an extremely talented soul who’s bizarre vision and insane work ethic still impacts people to this day.

Born December 21, 1940 in Baltimore, MD, Zappa was the eldest of four children. His father Francis was a chemist and mathematician who worked at a chemical plant relatively close to the home. This led not only to exposure to mustard gas and gas masks being stored in the home, but Zappa developing a fear and fascination of germs – a subject that would constantly appear in his lyrics (among other strange things). Zappa was also sick throughout most of his childhood.

Zappa was also very much pushed towards religion at an early age by his parents, another topic that Zappa would satirize in his musical career very often (for example, “Heavenly Bank Account”). Zappa was not a fan of any religion because he felt it promotes ignorance and anti-intellectualism.

It was during his High School years that Zappa would start to express interest in music. First playing drums before eventually learning guitar and a myriad of other instruments over the course of his life. By his senior year, Zappa would start composing and arranging avant-garde pieces for his school orchestra. He would attend college in 1959 but left after one semester and held a disdain for the public and higher education system to a degree where he would take his own children out of school at age 15 and refused to pay for college.

The 1960’s would be interesting years for Zappa as he would not only marry both of his wives (the brief Kathryn J. “Kay” Sherman and lifelong Adelaide Gail Sloatman), but also begin his music career writing and producing before fully launching it with The Mothers of Invention and their 1966 debut “Freak Out!” before disbanding The Mothers of Invention for the first time.

They would reunite the following year with Zappa dropping “of Invention” from their name.

The 70’s would bring Zappa more into his own as he dabbled in filmmaking with “200 Motels” and released several solo LP’s such as 1970’s “Weasels Ripped My Flesh,” 1974’s “Apostrophe” (which included the single “Don’t Eat the Yellow Snow”) and all three parts of “Joe’s Garage” – Zappa’s 1979 rock opera about an adolescent man that forms a rock band, gives all his money to religion, has sexual relations with machines and is driven to insanity when he wakes up from a coma to discover a world where the government has banned all music.

It should be noted that Zappa was notorious for never drinking or taking drugs.

Zappa would continue to raise eyebrows with his strange and humorous lyrics coupled with complex song arrangements in the 80’s and would discover a young guitarist by the name of Steve Vai. During this decade Zappa would reach the peak of his popularity, releasing some of his most famous works such as the “Shut Up ‘n Play Yer Guitar” trilogy, “You Are What You Is” and the first three of his series of live albums “You Can’t Do That On Stage Anymore.”

This is just scratching the surface of how much music the man released over his 30 year career.

Zappa would release music into the 90’s, creating classical arrangements of his works as well as composing new pieces with the German chamber ensemble, Ensemble Modern. They would perform his works at the 1992 Frankfurt Festival (Zappa was one of four composers whose works were chosen. The other three were John Cage, Karlheinz Stockhausen, and Alexander Knaifel). Other performances were scheduled in Los Angeles, but Zappa was only able to appear at two due to health issues. On December 4, 1993, Zappa died of prostate cancer – a condition he was diagnosed with in 1990. He was 52 years old. In 1995, Zappa was inducted posthumously into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and in 1997 he received the Grammy Lifetime Achievement award.

Zappa is survived by his four children Moon, Dweezil, Ahmet and Diva, who are all employed within the music and entertainment industries. Dweezil is also an accomplished musician and honors his fathers legacy by playing his songs in concerts known as “Zappa Plays Zappa.”

Throughout his career, Zappa released over 60 albums. The amount of music Zappa recorded is unknown as albums continue to to be released to this day, the last being “Dance Me This” which was released on June 12. He is consistently ranked in Rolling Stone’s “100 Greatest” lists.

Movies

Trailer Feedback: Herschell Gordon Lewis’ BloodMania (International Trailer)

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The Godfather of Gore is back with an offer we can’t refuse.

After six long years since 2009’s “The Uh-Oh Show,” director Herschell Gordon Lewis will be giving us what is being billed as “a new horror anthology” and we couldn’t be more excited.

BloodMania doesn’t give us many clues as to what the plot is other than it revolving around an all-girl rock band, murder (of course) and apparently “the worst day of Brewster Bricabrac’s life.”

Seeing as Bricabrac (who we can assume is the film’s main protagonist) gets run over by a steamroller and has one of his eyes gouged out it has to be.

Other than copious amounts of gore set to Edvard Grieg’s “In the Hall of the Mountain King”, there is some kind of demon/poltergeist lurking about and a disgusting old man who’s severed head winds up in an air vent. There’s also two women making out in a shower (which we can safely assume will die during the feature) and a pretty hilarious interaction between two homeless men (because why not?).

From the man who brought us such classics as “The Wizard of Gore,” “The Gore Girls” and “Blood Feast,” “BloodMania” looks to be a fit for every gore fan. While it won’t be up for an Oscar or mentioned in the same sentence as “Titanic” or “Good Will Hunting,” “BloodMania” will certainly cater to the niche audience that Lewis intended it for.

Music, Podcast

Bonesaw Podcast: Episode 20 – The Unravelling’s Steve Moore

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In a long-overdue return host Chris Butera sits down with The Unravelling’s Steve Moore to talk about his music, Moore’s battle with Cancer, and The Unravelling’s new album “Tear a Hole in the Collective Vision” (available at theunravelling.bandcamp.com).

Pro Wrestling

Manopera – Episode 3: Night of Champions (and Part Timers)

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manopera

Mr. Bonesaw and Spaceman Frank go over WWE Night of Champions.

Topics include, Brock Lesnar and The Undertaker’s upcoming Hell in a Cell match, Charlotte’s Divas Championship victory, the Tag Team division, Sting’s injury, and their thoughts on Seth Rollins next opponent – Kane. Frank gives his account of WWE’s Rochester live event.

Pro Wrestling

Spaceman Frank’s WWE Night of Champions Predictions

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By Frank Lucci

The WWE has managed to sneakily put together a pretty stacked card for Night of Champions, and on paper this pay-per-view has the potential to be one of the best of 2015. However, the key words in the previous sentence is “on paper,” and the company could ruin any of these exciting matchups faster than you can say exploding monitors (seriously, did we ever see that thing ever again?). Anyway, on to Spaceman Frank’s Night of Champions 2015 predictions.

Preshow match: The Lucha Dragons and Neville vs. Cosmic Wasteland (Stardust and the Ascension)

Can Stardust, Neville, R-Truth and King Barrett form a group called The Protectors of the Preshow and just be done with it? The WWE does not seem willing to push these wrestlers higher up the card despite the four doing the best with the scraps they are given. WIth Neville winning at Summerslam I see Stardust and his new henchmen getting the win in what can be a very exciting match. Hopefully then all those involved can find a more worthy spot on the card (Cosmic Wasteland harassing Rybak and Neville challenging for the US Championship with an actual storyline attached would be grand).

Dolph Ziggler vs. Rusev (with Summer Rae)

So Rusev is a heel because he dumped his girlfriend, shacked up with a new girl (who looks suspiciously like the old girl, least we know he has a type), and then acts like a pig. Ziggler on the other hand is clearly the face cause he…um…makes out with a dude’s ex in front of him and and dresses like a bully from any 80’s movie ever? Sure why not. With Lana hurt and a mixed tag match seemly not gonna happen, hopefully this feud between Eskimo brothers dies after this and everyone can move on. My prediction: Damien Sandow shows up, gets both girls, and struts out of the building like a boss. Real Prediction: Rusev wins and starts regaining some of the momentum he had as US Champ.

Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns, and TBA vs. The Wyatt Family (Bray Wyatt, Luke Harper, and Braun Strowman)

The last of the matches at Night of Champions to not have a title involved, this match largely depends on the mystery man joining Ambrose and Reigns. With names such as Randy Orton, Jimmy Uso,  and a returning Erik Rowan being thrown out along with surprises such as Chris Jericho and The Rock(!!!), this is the match that could be a dark horse or a flop. If the sixth man lives up to the hype and everyone does their part this could be a very good match. On the other hand, if the live crowd turns on the mystery man and the shenanigans that seem to follow Wyatt leak into this match this could be a major disappointment. Look for the Wyatt Family to sneak out a win after the Summerslam loss (barring a major surprise return) and perhaps a six man tag Hell in a Cell match?

The New Day (Kofi Kingston, Big E, and/or Xavier Woods) vs. The Dudley Boyz (Bubba Ray Dudley and D-Von Dudley) (WWE Tag Team Championship Match

The New Day simply are the best reason to watch WWE’s weekly programming, but the Dudley’s have been red hot since they returned the Raw after Summerslam. The champs deserve to retain based on their stellar work, and with Woods most likely waiting on the outside to cause a distraction or perhaps use the trombone as a foreign object to cause the DQ it is probable they will. That being said, the WWE might want to strike while the iron is hot with the boys from Dudleyville, and either outcome will be welcome to me. With all the talent involved this may sneak in as best match of the night.

P.S TRICEP MEAT YO

Ryback vs. Kevin Owens (Intercontinental Championship Match)

With the WWE giving the least amount of hype out of the four championship matches to this match, it is hard to feel as much excitement for Owen’s chase of the IC belt as the US belt.  The sad part is that Ryback has been doing well as champ, and it will be interesting to see if Ryback can build upon his momentum with an opponent that will force him to step up as oppose to an opponent that is largely immobile and sweats gallons after five minutes (cough). Bet on Ryback retaining in a decent match that will most likely be the best match for Ryback as champ and Owen’s worst pay-per-view match since joining the main roster.

Nikki Bella vs. Charlotte (Divas Championship match)

With the DIva’s Revolution stalling, this match needs to deliver. Now that all the drama surrounding if Nikki Bella would become the longest reigning Divas Champ of all time is in the books, it seems likely the WWE legitimizes the revolution with Charlotte winning. However, despite the Bella’s not being able to retain via DQ Team Bad may interfere or a member of PCB (cough Paige cough) could cost Charlotte her chance at the title. At this point i would be happy to see the three teams disband to pursue the title individually to keep things fresh, as there is only so many times the teams can face each other with nothing on the line and keep things interesting.

Seth Rollins vs. John Cena (US Championship match)

Keeping with the theme of “this could be good unless the WWE writers screw this up” this match could be good…unless the WWE writers screw this up. With Jon Stewart out of the picture these two could have a stellar match with a much cleaner finish, especially if my pick to win John Cena walks away with the belt. WIth Rollins having to work two matches the quality could be down somewhat, but with Captain Crossfit and his bag of tricks nobody will notice if he saves some energy for later. Cena winning is almost guaranteed considering Rollins seemingly giving two shits about the secondary title and Cena being who he is, but the journey should be fun.

Seth Rollins vs. Sting (WWE World Heavyweight Championship match)

Will Sting become the oldest champ in WWE history? Will Sheamus cash in? If he does, who will be champ? Will Ric Flair betray Sting after hitting his head and waking up thinking it is 1995 again? Will Triple H slap Sting with a bill for the destroyed statue? All these questions could be answered Sunday night. Rollins winning seems likely, but if the WWE decided to either A) give Sting a win and put him in the history books as one of their champs or B) have Sheamus cash in and walk out champ to try and drum up interest in the product during football season could very well happen. The crowd will certainly be into this match to start, but if Sting shows his age or if Rollins is fatigued from working two matches this could be a Taker vs. Lesnar situation. Expect decent but underwhelming work with most of the interest with what happens post-match rather than what happens during the match.  

Pro Wrestling

Manopera – Episode 2: Suplexes and Scandals

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manopera

Mr. Bonesaw and Spaceman Frank chat about the recent incidents regarding the Jimmy Snuka murder trial, Zahra Schreiber’s inappropriate photo, and the build to WWE Night of Champions so far in the second installment of this podcast.

Music

The Unravelling: Tear a Hole in the Collective Vision Review

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After a five year hiatus, battles with Cancer and a revolutionary new sound, Canada’s The Unravelling have returned with their striking sophomore release, “Tear a Hole in the Collective Vision.”

Ten tracks of beautiful, chaotic frustration make up the release, starting with “The Hydra’s Heart.” Gustavo de Beauville’s ambient, droning guitars over spacious synths, dancing drums and the agonized, rage-fueled vocals of Steve Moore fuel the album to life.

Weaving a morbid, raving web, the albums tempo picks up in the Powerman 5000-esque “Lucky Me,” then slows to a crawl in the title track and the gripping dirge “Out of the Depths.” Moore’s lyrics are of a man possessed, dissatisfied with society and the cards he has been given and willing to make a drastic change for better or worse. De Beauville’s scoring of Moore’s dwindling frustrations is timed immaculately, with each transfixed scream generating its own unique crescendo.

The remainder of the album continues with “The Fearless Seed,” the piss-and-vinegar ranting of “Enough is Enough, and ” “No One’s Song.” Also contained are the two singles (“Revolt” and “Master Drone“), and the albums ironic closer, “We Have No Problems.” What’s interesting is not only de Beauville’s sonic decoration of Moore’s chilling vocals, but the fact that both singles are the deeper cuts of the album rather than highlighted at the beginning. Placement is everything and if you read the lyrics, there is a damn good reason.

We very well may have a concept album on our hands.

While the album’s pace is of a slower pace than their previous effort “13 Arcane Hymns,” “Tear a Hole in the Collective Vision” (which can be downloaded here) is a more enraged horse of a different color. The Unravelling have gotten darker and angrier, emerging like a phoenix from the ashes out to solidify their place in musical history. Lyrically the album seems like there is a story element, especially when you think about the placement of the songs and the way they bleed into each other.

How’s that for a hole in your collective vision?