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Pro Wrestling

WCPW Loaded Episode 4: A Build to Destroy

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by Frank Lucci

WCPW returns with their fourth episode, the go-home show before their big “Built to Destroy” event next week; which seeks to  to crown the first WCPW Heavyweight Champion and the debut of former WWE Superstar Damien Sandow.

How will this installment fare with all the focus on next week? Let’s find out.

Episode four is the shortest yet, clocking in at a few minutes shy of 70. The show consists of only four segments; and as last week Adam Blampied is on commentary again with King Ross and the production continues to get better. They even have clips from the previous installment (it’s like I’m watching Raw from 1995!). All they need to do is speed up the entrances and they’ll have it all down.

Segment I: Gabriel Kidd vs. Drake

Adam Pacitti is out to make a few announcements, one of which is making a Primate vs. “Iron Man” Joe Coffey No Disqualification match for Built to Destroy.

Prince Ameen’s music plays for Gabriel Kidd’s entrance which is the most interesting thing he’s done so far. Drake is labeled as a “Gimmick Killer” who is here simply just to wrestle. Ameen begins the match by constantly shouting advice to Kidd, who eventually gets peeved at the Prince. Drake takes advantage of Kidd yelling at Ameen to win the short match that’s more about furthering the Ameen/Kidd storyline. Pacitti then comes out to declare a Built to Destroy match between the two where the loser becomes the winner’s slave. A decent way to kick things off.

Segment II: Prince Ameen vs. El Ligero vs. Martin Kirby

Pacitti makes this match at the end of the previous video. True story: El Ligero is billed from Los Santos, Mexico; which a) does not exist and b) is, in fact, the city from Grand Theft Auto 5. Kirby attacks his rival before Ameen tries to charge, being tossed outside for his efforts. Ligero’s in charge until Kirby trips him up and the heels team on up the babyface. Ligero botches a double-team suplex reversal, but recovers quickly – hitting a great enziguri. The masked luchador (whose name means “light” as in lightweight)  takes advantage of the heels bickering to regain control.

The finish comes when Ameen tries convincing Kidd to hit Ligero, only for Kidd to slap him (poorly) and Kirby to get a rollup pin. Kirby celebrates, but Ligero hits the tornado DDT and pins his rival to get the win. I’m guessing all Triple Threat matches in WCPW are elimination style, but the announcers forgot to mention that.

Kirby is once again upset with El Ligero and challenges him to a rematch with increasingly crazy stipulations. Examples include a Mask vs. Hair match (although Kirby looks like he has zero hair anywhere on his body), a Hog Pen match, and a pillow fight. Commissioner Pacitti (who really earns his paycheck this episode) makes the rematch official – with the loser either having to wear a dress (Kirby) or unmasking (El Ligero).

The first announcer segment of the night has King Ross and Adam Blampied do some decent albeit unmemorable banter to sell the recently made Built to Destroy matches.

Segment III: Noam Dar vs. Joseph Conners

Conners is out first and I really appreciate how snappy this episode is in terms of getting to the action. Gone are the dumb backstage segments with poor audio to slow things down. Everything takes place in the ring to Loaded’s benefit. Connors’ theme song is by Shattered Skies, an awesome Irish band (now based in London), which gets big points with the Spaceman. “Local Hero” Joe Hendry comes out to support his buddy and commentary play up how Hendry is stealing the spotlight from his tag team partner (I like the announcers being aware of wrestling tropes whereas the WWE announcers have to play dumb to stuff like this). Dar comes out to his Star Wars inspired entrance (I really hope he gets to show this much personality in the WWE Cruiserweight Classic, but I feel like they will just boil his personality down to “Israeli Badass”).

Technical wrestling begins the match, which the crowd appreciates and Blampied calls King Ross a troll (which I love). Dar is crisp as usual and Conners is… less so. Eventually the two men trade pin attempts before Dar gets his Kneebar in. Conners taps in a short match that nevertheless is a good change of pace from the usual style of wrestling we see in WCPW. Video ends with Drake promising to get vicious for manager James R. Kennedy.

Segment IV: Big Damo & “Iron Man” Joe Coffey vs. Rampage Brown & The Primate

Stealing a page out of WWE’s booking style has two impromptu tag teams formed from separate rivalries coming together. More hype from Blampied and Ross for the Built to Destroy special before Blampied leaves his co-commentator to be with his client Rampage. Each wrestler gets an entrance, which eats up a solid chunk of time in this 20-minute video.

This is one of my big pet peeves, I really wish they’d edit down the entrances and allowed for more wrestling, or just have shorter videos in general. Ross claims that Rampage “Just likes to eat people for a living” (never change, King). The big hoss fight starts between Coffey and Rampage, which ends from a surprisingly nimble dropkick from Coffey. Coffey later hits a triangle crossbody from the second turnbuckle, which surprised the hell out me (almost spilled rum and coke on my computer).

The heels take control of Coffey and Primate bites his rival while having him in a headlock (brilliant). The heels seem to be more on the same page than the faces as both Coffey and Damo want to attack their respective opponents for Built to Destroy rather than win the match. Blampied calls for a Piledriver, but since Rampage doesn’t want to get banned from WCPW he is slow to do so. This gives Coffey the chance to put Rampage in a big swing/catapult to the corner spot to get some breathing room. Each man tag in their partners but Damo is the one who gets control of the match.

All four men begin brawling and knock out the referee, which can only mean one thing: it’s time for a Dusty Finish. This leads to Blampied and Primate’s manager Suzie to team up on Jack the Jobber for the dreaded “big slap,” but Jack avoids it and Suzie accidentally hits Blampied – who goes flying. A squad of refs try to separate the wrestlers with no success. Prospect and Kirby come out, but instead of restoring order they attack Big Damo. This brings out more faces and in another charge of Grand Theft Booking we have a big old fracas around the ring. Damo powerbombs Gracie onto some of the wrestlers by the ramp to close out the show, while overall solid is an obvious go-home show to set up Built to Destroy.

Pro Wrestling

Spaceman Frank Calls The Final Deletion

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by Frank Lucci

The world sat in amazement as Matt and Jeff Hardy dropped the now infamous contract signing video for their Full Metal Mayhem match at TNA’s Slammiversary Pay-Per-View, but that proved not to be the final chapter in this feud.

For you see, “Broken” Matt Hardy challenged Brother Nero to another match – this time at the Hardy estate that would be shown on what turned out to be the most-watched episode of TNA Impact during their Pop TV run. What follows is 17 minutes of pure nonsense that Spaceman Frank cannot possibly ignore. This is….THE FINAL DELETION!

Like all good wrestling videos, this one begins at a children’s birthday party. The child in question is Maxel Hardy on his very first birthday, and parents “Broken” Matt and (probably not broken) Reby Sky celebrate with their admittedly cute baby. Constant scene stealer/gardner Senor Benjamin shows up to deliver with gift (an “EXTRAORDINARY” xylophone) and question Matt’s mental health.

We’re roughly two minutes in and already several quick questions arise. One: Why did they set up this elaborate birthday party when only three people showed up? Two: Every parent will tell you that musical gifts, while they seem like a good idea, become positively evil in the hands of a toddler (Good luck trying to do anything listening to that kid bang away on that xylophone for hours on end). And three: What’s with the El Generico balloon??? He’s helping orphans in Mexico, Matt!!! I know you’re broken but come on!

Reby Sky asks where Matt’s gift is (despite the big gift labeled “From Mommy and Daddy” right behind him). Rather than simply turn around and give the kid his present, Matt decides to answer by standing up and turning 90-degrees to face the camera instead of his spouse. He declares that his gift will be destroying the “evil enigma” Jeff Hardy and expunging him from the Hardy line. The broken one breaks the fourth wall to let everyone know they’re filming this so that it can be “documented for historical purposes.” He then orders Senor Benjamin to prepare the battlefield…FOR MASSACRE!

This is already better than Savage vs. Steamboat at ‘Mania III.

See?

Meanwhile, Jeff Hardy skips his nephew’s birthday party to make lawn art (Maybe that’s why Senor Benjamin turns on him later, bitter and enraged that Jeff does his own lawnscaping instead of hiring him. The tale of Senior Benjamin has many layers.) We get a faux-Terminator style filter and booping noises to let us know that a drone is looking for Jeff. Hilarious pause button jokes include labeling Jeff’s Twist of Fate as phony and his various aliases Jimmy Jack Tompkins and “The Masked Mountain” (Please let there be a story behind these names). It turns out there’s not just one drone but a whole fleet, but Jeff quickly takes them out with his trusty acoustic guitar.

So that’s where TNA’s budget went…

Matt Hardy goes full Sith Lord by showing up as a hologram on one of the drones to make the match official (Funny how the hologram conveniently shows up behind a blue wall so that it would be easier to edit in). Jeff gives chase to Vanguard 1 (the head drone) on a dirtbike, while Matt takes this opportunity to be a dick and destroy Jeff’s lawn art (For Senior Benjamin!). Fun fact: Number of words said by Jeff Hardy at this point in the video -six (“What the hell?” and “Oh Hell no!”).

TNA sneakily adds a few ads letting people know that Impact is moving to Thursdays (probably to counteract WWE SmackDown! going live on Tuesdays). These are pretty lame and interrupt the excellent action. Moving on.

Senor Benjamin is preparing the battlefield for the aforementioned massacre, which includes getting a garbage can full of fireworks and digging a big pit by himself. Sky shows up to once again as Matt arrives with gasoline to dump into the pit. She seems slightly turned on by Matt and Senior Benjamin’s murder conspiracy. True relationship goals right there.

Six minutes in and we finally get to the wrestling (almost). A confused referee drives up to the ring, which is where we find Matt playing a terribly out of tune violin to “summon” Brother Nero. Matt issues a DNR order on Jeff, which is probably not legally binding. More hot nonsense as Matt says the violin he has was given to him by Antonio Stradivari (who died in 1737). Jeff shows up, just as Matt “knew” would happen. Before we get to the actual action, here comes a shameless plug from “Cowboy” James Storm to remind us that Impact is moving (You know, in case your mind has collapsed watching this and forgot the previous ad a few minutes ago). I feel like Matt found an actual copy of Robert W. Chambers’ “The King in Yellow,” which would explain his madness and the quality of this feud.

The Final Deletion finally starts at around eight minutes in with a church bell instead of a ring bell, which is actually kind of cool. What follows is action on par with Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit, (just kidding, the in-ring action is so choppy it’s hard to even consider it a real wrestling match). Clubbing blows turn into a superplex by Jeff, who then grabs a flimsy piece of wicker fence to throw Matt into (Seriously, all the shit under the ring and you go for that? Unless the ivy on it is poison ivy…take notes, Peyton Royce). The wicker spot only gets a two count, with the ref giving the “metal horns” two count hand sign to signify how much this match”rocks.” Matt counters with a Twist of Fate which only gets a two, probably because there are still several more minutes of “historical documentation” to go. Kendo stick and ladder shots follow. Matt chokes his brother with the ladder while yelling “DELETE” over and over again.

Jeff eventually rallies by hitting his famous Twist of Fate/Take shirt off/Swanton Bomb combo, but it only gets a non-metal two. What follows is one of the most infamous spots of the match, where Jeff climbs a tree for an epic Swanton which….does not go well at all. He misses Matt and clips the ladder, which gets a solid dent in it from the impact from his spine (Definitely a big “oh shit” moment in between some laughable stuff. I’m guessing Jeff took a few minutes to rest between takes on that one). The big spot still only gets a two (even though the music became somber and everything). Matt recovers and brings out a fireworks cannon, blasting it at Jeff (and probably setting the lawn on fire). Jeff blocks the legit dangerous spot with a garbage can lid and finally breaks double digits in terms of words spoken (“What’s wrong with you??”).

After the smoke clears (you know, so they could keep shooting) Matt goes looking for Brother Nero. In my favorite spot of the match, Matt finally drops the accent (or accents, considering how often it changes) and drop yells “OH SHIT” when he realizes Jeff found the fireworks gun. Brother Nero shoots vaguely at Matt, who takes cover behind a dilapidated boat (I guess he’s too good for the trashcan lid).

The ref finally starts showing concern for the participants in the match by asking Jeff if he submits to a sleeper hold. Matt emerges first after they fall into a pond but in a shocking twist (of fate) Willow Emerges! Jeff’s alter ego attacks Matt’s neck with a flag and our ears with his high pitched shriek. Senor Benjamin, pissed that these two idiots burned up his precious lawn with fireworks, tasers Willow (Side note: wouldn’t this also cause Matt and Senor Benjamin to get shocked since they’re all standing in a pond?) After stumbling around Matt finds Willow and gets the three count but another shocking twist (of fate!!!) reveals that WILLOW IS SOMEHOW SENOR BENJAMIN!!!

At this point I expect somebody to say “Three minutes,” Eric Bischoff takes off his referee mask and Jamal and Rosey beat everyone up. Kind of like a certain infamous WWE segment that did nothing for any of the parties involved and angered the LGBT community in 2002.

Yes, that one.

Anyway, the pinfall doesn’t count and Jeff just kind of shows up again so they can fit in the gasoline pit spot. With the sun beginning to rise (and the crew tired and wanting to go home) Jeff climbs a giant Hardy symbol. Matt gets Maxel’s birthday candle from Reby and lights the structure on fire (which looks like it should have set Matt on fire too. Three cheers for continuity, people!) and Jeff…just kind of falls off. Matt is nice enough to move his brother away from the flames before scoring the victory. The broken one poses and the video ends.

While it’s easy to see why this video has gone viral, hopefully TNA doesn’t put out more of these. There’s no doubt The Final Deletion is entertaining, but it walks a fine line between “so bad it’s good” and “so bad TNA shuts down.” We’ve already seen WWE try to do the same thing with The Wyatts vs. The New Day with terrible results and I don’t trust TNA to strike lightning twice. The Hardys and TNA should celebrate this accomplishment, but keep in mind that this is supposed to be about wrestling – and the actual wrestling portions of this video are pretty godawful. Watch this video for a laugh, but please God don’t make this type of wrestling videos a thing. Stick to the stuff inside the squared circle.

Podcast, Pro Wrestling

Manopera! Episode 21: Balor, Nakamura and the Wyatt Family Deletion

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Chris and Spaceman Frank analyze the infamous “Final Deletion,” The Wyatt Family vs. The New Day, Nakamura and Finn Balor’s epic encounter and way more in a heavy-hitting podcast.

 

Pro Wrestling

WCPW Loaded Episode 3: Once, Twice, Three Times a Rampage

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by Frank Lucci

The third episode of WCPW Loaded is easily the strongest so far in terms of presentation.

The audio problems that plagued the first two episodes are finally gone and there are less backstage interviews slowing things down and more action in the ring. Unfortunately, the matches this week were not as strong; meaning that although WCPW is still on the rise, there are still a few kinks that need to be worked out.

Episode Three is a tighter episode. Clocking in at around 70 minutes,compared to the 90 minutes episode two ran. This is a good length for the show, and they save time by having less backstage interviews, commentary team segments and cutting some entrances down. I only wish they would further cut down some wrestlers entrances, as by the time matches get going sometimes you can be through a third of the video.

Also, Simon Miller is not on commentary this time around due to his real-life training to become a pro wrestler (I’m sure he’s a nice guy, but he can’t compare to King Ross and his replacement for most of this episode Adam Blampied).

Segment I: Joe Hendry Calls Out Rampage Brown

“Local Hero” Joe Hendry is furious that he’s not in the WCPW Heavyweight Championship match after losing to Big Damo and brings up the good point that Brown didn’t have to beat anyone to get into the match. Therefore, Hendry wants to face Rampage for the number one contendership. This obviously brings out Brown and his manager Blampied, who accept and declare that Hendry will go from “Local Hero “to Rampage’s “Local Bitch” in a main event booking 101 segment that does exactly what it’s supposed to do.

Segment II: Primate vs. “Iron Man” Joe Coffey

Immediately we go to the entrances and The Primate (with his manager Suzie) comes out to his cool entrance music. Less cool is his cheap looking mask and Gene Simmons fake blood spitting spot. According to Blampied, Primate has a beard you could “set your watch to” (a mandatory Simpsons reference). Coffey comes out to his painfully obvious knockoff of Black Sabbath’s “Iron Man” (which is still cool as the crowd lovingly sings the riff during his entrance).

As for the actual wrestling, this is a big hoss fight that ends when they brawl to the outside, tossing each other through the metal barricades. Primate then hits the Iron Man with a wrench for the DQ. Pretty generic stuff where part of the problem is that many of the WCPW wrestlers fit the same basic look. Both Primate and Coffey are big dudes with big beards and plain tights. Throw in Drake and Big Damo and you got four guys that are pretty interchangeable besides weight and haircut. Get some variety, fellas.

Segment III: Big Damo vs. Drake

Before the match Big Damo and his manager Jack the Jobber have a “shill the merch” spot, which is saved by Jack’s fear of Damo and the crowd being able to respond to the promo instead of just seeing these two talk in front of a green screen. Drake makes his way out and gets squashed by the big Irishman, who looks good heading into his championship match in a few weeks. Not much else to say here.

Segment IV: Prospect (Gracie and Archer) vs. Myers and Mercer

Another squash match shows Prospect (accompanied by manager James R. Kennedy) beating up two skinny guys. The crowd chants, “You are Butt Boys” at Prospect who manhandle the other tag team. Prospect are similar to NXT’s Blake and Murphy in that they are a respectable team with little personality, which is fine for now seeing as there are no other tag teams in WCPW to worry about (I imagine they will be drifting along for awhile).

Segment V: Martin Kirby vs. El Ligero

The third consecutive squash match has Kirby bring in an out of shape, fake El Ligero instead of the real one. King Ross attempts his best Jerry Lawler impression trying to sell everyone that this is the real Ligero with mixed results. Kirby beats up the imposter for a time – taunting him on the mic in the process. While this is a good heel tactic, the crowd quickly loses interest aside from starting up a “Fat Ligero” chant.

Eventually the real El Ligero sneaks into the match and rolls up Kirby for the win. When Kirby realizes what happened (far later than he should have since the true El Ligero is much smaller and was wearing both different colored trunks and mask – was the ref even paying attention?) he is upset and complains to no avail. An alright match but not much to get excited about here.

Segment VI: Rampage Brown vs. “Local Hero” Joe Hendry

King Ross is alone on commentary a la Joey Styles, as Blampied is with his main man Brown during the match. Hendry’s theme song (sung by the Local Hero himself, one of Spaceman Frank’s favorite gimmicks) is great, but hearing it in full twice during one show is too much. Ross puts over both men’s accomplishments, including Rampage’s brief stints in both WWE and TNA.

Hendry plays the plucky babyface here, which is odd considering he seems destined to be a cocky heel. Brown bludgeons his way through the match, until Hendry storms back. Despite his efforts, Hendry can’t get the three and a Blampied trip-up turns into a massive Rampage Samoan Drop for the win. Hendry looks sad in the ring as the show closes.

While the production of this episode was much better, having a match end in a DQ followed by three squash matches was a little tiring and the main event (while good) was nowhere near as exciting as Jay Lethal vs. El Ligero or Noam Dar vs. Rampage Brown from episode two. Episode three feels like filler as we wait for the big July 25 episode with the first-ever WCPW Championship match and EL Ligero eventually challenging for Lethal’s Ring of Honor World Title.

 

Pro Wrestling

WCPW Loaded Episode 1: A Rampage Begins

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by Frank Lucci

WhatCulture Wrestling has quickly become one of the premiere pro wrestling channels on YouTube and from humble beginnings in late 2014, the channel has managed to eclipse the subscriber count of TNA.

An extension of the WhatCulture.com, the British brand has become so successful that they recently started their own wrestling federation, WCPW (What Culture Pro Wrestling) and have filmed several episodes for online release.

The first episode is broken down into six separate uploads which can be viewed in about an hour and a half. Production wise, the set looks amazing and the video production is top notch. Special mention goes the comic book style drawings of the wrestlers that begin each match. However, the audio is hit or miss. The announcers (King Ross, who is great and Simon Miller, who is…there) come out clear, while everything else from the crowd (interviewers, etc) is muted. This is especially bad during backstage interviews where whoever holds the microphone is the only person who can usually be heard.

Segment I: WCPW Introduction

WCPW General Manager Adam Pacitti starts the show off. He thanks the crowd for supporting the channel and announces he will reveal the WCPW Heavyweight Championship at the end of the show. We also get a backstage segment where Adam Blampied makes fun of Jack the Jobber. Nothing much here unless you’re new to the channel.

Segment II: Alex Gracie vs. Gabriel Kidd vs. Joseph Conners (Triple Threat Elimination match)

This video sets up the formula for each segment after this (logo intro, King Ross and Simon banter, match, backstage interview). The Ross and Simon sections are decent but nothing special and the backstage interviews suffer from the aforementioned audio problems.

As for this match itself, this was a good opener. Each man worked hard, but this was set up to establish Connors as an up and coming babyface and Gracie as the opportunist heel with partner Lucas Archer and manager James R. Kennedy. Conners has a great DDT finisher that he uses to beat Kidd, but Gracie gets DQ’ed when his gang attacks Connors. A good start to the program but pretty forgettable in the long haul. Highlights include the crowd calling Gracie and Archer “bum boys” for having their names on the back of their tights and some good three man spots.

Segment III: El Ligero vs. Martin Kirby

Perhaps the most entertaining match on this episode, as this is all comedy. Both men represent different Nintendo franchises on their gear, as Ligero has different Mario icons on his gear and mask and Kirby has, well, Kirbys. The story of the match is Martin being a ridiculous Bo Dallas type who tries to copy Ligero’s poses. When the two actually wrestle the action is crisp and El Ligero wins with an epic tornado DDT.

Segment IV: Prince Ameen vs. “Iron Man” Joe Coffey

Ameen has a so-so in ring interview before the match, which is helped by King Ross’ commentary. Ross, being King, refuses to sit during Ameen’s speech and hypes his fellow royalty (I like how the announcers and wrestlers actually acknowledge the crowd’s chants, unlike the WWE where most people just steamroll through interviews). When “Iron Man” Joe Coffey comes out, the crowd sings Black Sabbath’s legendary “Iron Man”riff (which I love). Wrestling wise however, this is pretty so-so with an abrupt finish when Ameen walks away from the match and gets counted out. An unfortunate low point in the show.

Segment V: “Local Hero” Joe Hendry vs. Big Damo (Winner faces Rampage Brown for the WCPW Heavyweight Championship)

The main event of the show sees Local Hero Hendry (literally referred to as such) and Big Damo fighting to be Jack the Jobber’s representative. Hendry makes an Adele parody video (which is gold), causing Damo to snap and attack Hendry before the bell.

This match is one big brawl, with both men pulling off some power moves – including Hendry hitting a big fallaway slam on the massive Damo. A ref bump causes Jack to become involved as he tries to stop the modern day gladiators from using a steel chair. Both attempts fail, but it is Damo’s use of the chair that helps him defeat the Local Hero. A decent showing that sets up a big hoss match between Damo and Rampage.

Segment VI: WCPW Title Reveal

Pacitti comes back out to reveal the new title, which looks pretty good. However, this brings out Brown and Blampied. They poke fun at Pacitti and hype Brown up as a future champ before Rampage goes on a tear and chokes Pacitti. This brings out a random security guard who gets a piledriver for his efforts. The episode ends with Brown ripping up the cardboard WhatCulture belt.

Overall, this was a good showcase of what we can expect from WCPW. There definitely needs to be some work, but the skeleton of a quality wrestling show is here.

Podcast, Pro Wrestling

Manopera! Episode 20: MITB 2016 – Suspensions and Speculations

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In light of Roman Reigns’ shocking suspension, our hosts break down the former WWE Champion’s possible return scenarios, review Money in the Bank 2016 and continue to speculate on the upcoming brand split.

Pro Wrestling

Spaceman Frank’s Money in the Bank 2016 Predictions

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Official Money in the Bank 2016 poster. Credit: WWE.com

by Frank Lucci

Oh Money in the Bank. Considered to be on the level or just below the Big Four Pay-Per-Views (Royal Rumble, WrestleMania, SummerSlam and Survivor Series), oftentimes the event is one big tease.

We get excited over who gets the Money in the Bank contract and will most likely get a run with the WWE World Heavyweight title, but considering how recent winners have fared when they’ve actually cashed in (Sheamus, Rollins, etc.) it’s been either a blessing or a curse depending on the Superstar. With a whopping ten matches scheduled for this year’s event, this could be a down year for the PPV. Nonetheless, Spaceman Frank is here to predict what will happen at Money in the Bank 2016.

MITB Kickoff: The Lucha Dragons vs. The Dudley Boyz

A recent edition to the pre-show will feature the Dudleys again being wasted on another meaningless and directionless feud with a team that frankly should have broken up once Kalisto won the United States Championship. Neither team has done much and with a sudden influx of tag teams (none of whom seem to be doing anything significant other than The New Day and Enzo and Cass) there is no reason to care about this match. Can we get a continued singles run for Kalisto please? The Dudley Boyz will pick up the win because they are the veteran team and are due for a victory.

The Golden Truth vs. Breezango

For whatever reason this feud is still a thing. While I’m all for lower card guys getting storylines to work with, this has been stretching out two weeks of plot devices in what has felt like three years. Fandango should replace the recently released Adam Rose in the Social Outcasts and Tyler Breeze might as well join The New Day since he is a regular on Xavier Woods’ UpUpDownDown YouTube channel. Meanwhile, The Golden Truth has some potential as a veteran tag team with oddball personalities, but they can’t even get into the Fatal Four Way for the tag belts because of this atrocious angle. Breezango wins because somebody has to win and it might as well be the super handsome guys.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Baron Corbin

On the plus side these guys have managed to get off the pre-show. On the negative side these guys are still stuck feuding. Either man could have spiced up the Money in the Bank ladder match, but instead we have to see the same match we’ve been watching since WrestleMania ended. Ziggler wins to finally end this and make him look strong in time for the brand split.

Apollo Crews vs. Sheamus

Yet another match featuring wrestlers thrown together with minimal story (at least this is a fresh pairing) because both men need something to do until the brand split. Crews has been getting the Breeze treatment since joining the main roster and Sheamus has done nothing even though he has a major role in the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie. Rocksteady-err Sheamus wins because of said movie while Crews continues to just be happy he was invited to the party.

Charlotte and Dana Brooke vs. Natalya and Becky Lynch

Instead of having Charlotte defend her Womens Championship, she’s dealing with her new BFF Dana Brooke being a klutz of a partner while Nattie and Becky are just kind of there. Despite having a wide range of competitors to challenge for the title, this match exists as an extension of the never ending Charlotte vs. Nattie feud.

The WWE is currently very, very guilty of beating dead-horse storylines (see Ziggler and Corbin), maybe because the upcoming brand split but also probably due to laziness. Anyway, the Spaceman thinks Charlotte and Brooke pick up the win because Nattie can never have nice things.

The New Day (C) vs. The Club vs. Enzo and Cass vs. The Vaudevillians (Tag Team Championships Match)

This match should be pretty exciting based on the promos alone and each team can deliver in the ring. It would be nice if The New Day won out and carried the belts for a full year, but I don’t see that happening. Instead, The Club will walk away with the gold. For one, they’re the only tag team in the match without a fun side, making them a wildcard in this match. Second, with The New Day now as faces and the two recent NXT callups still finding their footing The Club is prime for a championship win. They need the titles to help make their group more legit and the epic New Day vs. Enzo and Cass feud that will eventually happen can take place without the championships being on the line.

Rusev (C) vs. Titus O’Neil (United States Championship Match)

An epic hoss fight, these two are capable of having a fun match that will probably be around seven minutes long. Many feared that O’Neil would be punished after his suspension, while others feared Rusev would be buried by a returning John Cena after his newfound title win.

Thankfully neither scenario seems to be the case. Rusev will keep the gold here, as I see this as a way for the WWE to test the waters on a Titus title run to see if he can take his awesome hot-tag fire and ignite a singles push. 

Then again, MITB takes place on Father’s Day. Would it not be a wonderful swerve if the WWE gave the 2015 Celebrity Dad of the Year award winner his first singles title instead of another tie?

Sami Zayn vs. Cesaro vs. Chris Jericho vs. Dean Ambrose vs. Kevin Owens vs. Alberto Del Rio (Money in the Bank Ladder Match)

The marquee matchup of this event has been hampered somewhat by the fact that one: we’ve seen all the competitors (especially Zayn, Owens and Cesaro) have matches against each other on every single Raw and SmackDown! in the past few weeks and two: it seems unrealistic that anybody besides Ambrose or Owens will win the match.

Ambrose has flirted with the main event scene since The Shield broke up and winning the briefcase could help him finally ascend to the next level. Owens fits the bill of the classic sneaky heel Money in the Bank winner who can cash in on a wounded babyface. Overall, Ambrose fits the bill best and needs the briefcase more than anyone else.

John Cena vs. AJ Styles

The WWE is fast-tracking this dream match, which I honestly thought would be a big-money SummerSlam encounter rather than a B PPV headliner. The battle between the two faces of two very different companies finally happens and people have been quick to assume that Cena will be the victor.

Both men have managed to sell this matchup solely on mic work and even more important we have not seen Cena job out The Club on Raw or SmackDown! (as he is known to do), thus preserving their status as game changers. Since this is the first encounter between the two icons, I see Styles taking this match for the OMG IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED pop (just like Owens’ clean win over the Cenation leader last year), leading to a bitter grudge match at SummerSlam.

Roman Reigns (C) vs Seth Rollins (WWE World Heavyweight Championship Match)
This match is heavily overshadowed by rumors that the top championship in the company will become two world titles due to the brand split. This is especially poignant considering that Rollins has been pretty justified in his rage towards Reigns, who he sees as an unworthy champion considering he never beat Rollins (who was forced to relinquish his title upon injury last year).

With the WWE continuously in a bind with Reigns as champ, having shenanigans occur during this match offers the company the chance to have their cake and eat it too. Some sort of DQ/non-finish will occur, giving WWE an excuse to split the titles and allow them to have Reigns be one champ while Rollins can hold the gold for the smark crowd on the secondary brand.

Podcast, Pro Wrestling

Manopera! Episode 19: NXT TakeOver – The End (Sort of)

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Chris and Spaceman Frank discuss NXT TakeOver: The End, Will Ospreay vs. Ricochet and the bizarre TNA Slammiversary angle between Matt and Jeff Hardy.

Pro Wrestling

Spaceman Frank’s NXT TakeOver: The End Predictions

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by Frank Lucci

Despite the ominous title, the newest NXT TakeOver live event special is not the end of the highly praised series – but it does have some finality hanging over it.

With many of the top NXT talent already on the main roster and several more possibly leaving NXT for Raw or SmackDown! when the brand split occurs in July, this may be the last TakeOver event with some of the classic NXT talents people first latched onto when WWE first began having live specials for the developmental brand.

Here are Spaceman Frank’s predictions for NXT Takeover: The End.

Andrade “Cien” Almas vs. Tye Dillinger

Poor Tye Dillinger. Despite having lots of crowd support and a marketable gimmick, the poor guy lives just to put over new talent. With so many of the old NXT guard on the main roster, would a push for “The Perfect Ten” be too much to ask?

His opponent, the former La Sombra, has been working NXT live events (as well as a dark match at NXT Takeover: Dallas) and has received rave reviews from live audiences. Random side note: I like that Andrade has “Cien” as a nickname instead of being “Cien Almas. ” As much fun as No Way Jose is, it’s hard to take him seriously with no real name. In addition, it’s rumored that Almas is going to be heavily featured in the Cruiserweight Classic this summer, so it’s pretty clear that he’s going to beat Dillinger.

America Alpha (C) vs. The Revival (NXT Tag Team Championships match)

This matchup is a big toss-up. For one, champs American Alpha are super over with the crowd and have routinely handled The Revival at live events. However, the champions are frequently discussed as the next tag team to jump to the main roster, so they could easily lose the titles and then move on. The Revival are a better version of the now broken up Blake and Murphy and shine as the talented yet generic heel tag team that make good diabolical champs. It’s time for a two time champion in NXT and The Revival will reclaim their belts so Jordan and Gable can make their leap forward.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Austin Aries

The big new dream match for The End sees the two men who debuted at NXT Takeover: Dallas clash and have an unofficial number one contenders match for the NXT Championship.

Nakamura can do no wrong at Full Sail as the crowd pops big time whenever his theme song hits. Meanwhile, Aries has the crowd begging for his heel turn; as A Double would be the perfect bad guy to slide into the main event picture. The big question here is if Aries turns on the live special or if he saves it for NXT’s weekly programming. I’m predicting Nakamura wins clean here, causing Aries to descend into madness later – making Swagsuke look good while the cameras are live.

Asuka (C) vs. Nia Jax (NXT Women’s Championship Match)

First teased at Takeover: London, this match is brimming with potential.

Asuka was able to take down Bayley, but can she handle a motivated Jax who’s been taking down every other woman on the NXT roster? Conspicuous in her absence is former champ Bayley, who (kayfabe) was injured by Jax and thus unable to get her rematch. It seems blasphemous to leave Bayley out of a TakeOver, as NXT could have easily added more drama or intrigue by having this be a triple threat or having Bayley be the guest referee. By having her out it seems plain as day that Asuka hangs on to her title so the two can have their big rematch in front of the much larger NXT Takeover: Brooklyn crowd while Jax gets valuable reps so she can be NXT’s next big heel.

Samoa Joe (C) vs Finn Balor (Steel Cage Match for the NXT Championship)

The fourth and (probably) final match  between these former friends is sure to be memorable. When it was assumed this feud was played out, NXT pulled a shocker when Joe won the NXT Championship at an untelevised show. Instead of having Balor immediately jump to the main roster to join his mates in The Club, he’s been showing more fire than ever in trying to reclaim the gold.

Joe has been perfect on the microphone as champ and I’m sure WWE wishes they could give their main roster champion Roman Reign’s half the ability this Samoan has. Throw in not only a rare stipulation but the first-ever NXT cage match at Full Sail and this could be a classic feud finisher that has been sorely lacking in this age of 50/50 WWE booking.

Both men deserve to make it to the main roster ASAP, but I see Joe retaining so WWE can begin hyping Balor coming to the main roster and Joe can lay down the groundwork for a match with Nakamura that will be so heavy Iron Maiden will write a concept album about it.

Pro Wrestling

Spaceman Frank Special Report: Matt and Jeff Hardy TNA Slammiversary Contract Signing – The Movie!

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by Frank Lucci

I don’t follow TNA, but still keep up with the various going-ons within the company (mostly to see the latest “LOLTNA” moments that they’ve become synonymous with).

On the latest episode of Impact we got perhaps the best example of why the company is subject to so many “going out of business” rumors. This Tuesday night, we got the epic mini movie for the contract signing between Matt and Jeff Hardy – a piece of cinema so great they put out a director’s cut for those needing to see even more of the intense Hardy acting. Naturally, Spaceman Frank could not help but deliver a blow-by-blow of this masterpiece.

– To kick things off we get opening shots of the Matt Hardy estate, one of which includes a sweeping crane overhead (Isn’t TNA broke? Did they spend their evening’s budget on this or did they just hire one of the Hardy’s friends to climb a tree with a camcorder? Also, who is the director of this movie? I suspect his name rhymes with Shmatt Shmardy).

– Seth Rollins’ dad welcomes us to MTV Cribs! Oh wait, it’s just a rough (and I do mean rough. Don’t do drugs or fall off ladders, kids!) Matt Hardy stepping out of his McMansion – complete with white picket front patio. The house and reality TV establishing shots totally do not line up with the sweeping orchestral score and Matt’s Hot Topic pirate garb.

– Matt invites “all of you, plus the world and Brother Nero,” here in an opening narration while he stands on his walkway making random faces with his arms up (Doesn’t the world pretty much count for everyone already Matt? Or is “all of us” the 33,000 plus people who have watched this YouTube clip?). Halfway through the narration it switches to Matt actually talking (probably due to a passing truck honking its horn during the first part of the speech). Did I mention Matt went from sounding like a good ole boy to putting on a faux posh accent for this movie? Now that’s ka-rayy-zyy!!!

– Jeff Hardy is riding his dirt bike around his admittedly sweet looking property (and smaller McMansion) before driving up to Matt’s (Two questions here. One: Are dirt bikes road legal, or this this how we figure out that Jeff is a rebel? And two: FOR GOD’S SAKE, WHERE THE HELL IS YOUR HELMET JEFF!?). Here come more crane shots of Jeff driving with a heavy metal soundtrack as he pulls up to Matt’s house, which hilariously has a big “H” on the front gate like he’s fucking Batman.

– Reby Sky (Matt’s wife) is there to meet Jeff, who mumbles something about it being a trap. Sky doesn’t have time for that though, because Matt is acting ka-rayy-zyy and she’s getting the hell out of here. Jeff is super upset about this, despite the fact that she’s getting her infant son out of the way of a “crazy” guy and is actually being a responsible human being. Jeff storms into the building, where Matt is playing piano – the craziest of all instruments (besides the piccolo). Matt gives another monologue about how this is not about the contract signing, but about how Jeff needs to see that Matt is solely responsible for the success of the Hardys (because it was Matt’s daredevil antics and good looks that lead to him becoming WWE Champion and having an amazing feud with CM Punk…oh wait…).

– Jeff responds by shouting a whole bunch (you know, to add drama). Honestly, despite Matt’s accent changing roughly every scene he’s a better actor than Jeff because he’s at least trying. Tommy…err, Matt decides that to settle this once and for all, the contract signing for their match at Slammiversary needs to happen at “the sanctuary of our genesis” aka an old ring in a barn. Epic music plays as Matt walks to the barn and stops to say hi to his gardener, which makes me immediately flash back to this infamous scene from “The Room” (below). Jeff ignores the gardener, most likely because he keeps getting smash-cut to different places.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOdjtiOMGbA

– Matt’s in the middle of the ring, until Jeff storms the barn. As Jeff gets close enough to the squared circle Matt attempts to roll out of the ring but clearly has trouble doing so. Matt looks less than graceful here, especially with the contract and his coat flopping around audibly in the massive barn. A conveniently placed table is next to the ring and is literally the only other thing in this room. Matt signs the contract, but Jeff wants to get it on with “Big Money Matt” and his “sarcastic ass.” Anyway, the camera does a 360-degree shot of the two (or at least attempts it before the cameraman realizes he can’t go all the way around the brothers with the table being too close to the ring and then he just kind of starts going the other way). TNA: Combining immaculate storytelling with quality camera work for 14 years.

– Things get taken up another notch on the ka-rayy-zyy scale as Sky comes back and throws Jeff her baby, but it’s a fake (OH LAWD, SOMEBODY CALL SNITSKY!!!). Matt then blast Jeff from behind with some sort of green bottle – in this massive barn where we just established was completely empty aside from a wrestling ring and a table with a contract on it. This leads to the epic climax where Jeff takes a Side Effect off the ring apron onto the table – in slow motion. Honestly, the bump looks painful as the ground is concrete and the table is a regular roundtable that just breaks at the base instead of in half; but the slow motion effect kills this moment. Matt recovers and declares that “Brother Nero is over” as we fade to black.

Final thoughts: Wow…just wow. I really want to know whose idea this was. They could have filmed this at the Impact Zone on the cheap and it would have been much better. Smash style editing, hokey music, hammy acting and a nonsensical story makes this a hallmark of TNA badness. At this point, I’ve had my fill of TNA for the rest of year but chances are I’ll see Dixie Carter and company in 2017 when we get the sequel they’ll claim we “demanded.”